To: The Single Ladies

Here’s the thing, with Valentine’s Day quickly approaching and many of my recent posts being related to frugal date nights, romantic comedies {I want to share my favorite romance movies too}, and other V-Day related topics swirling around the internet, my heart got heavy.

If you are enjoying your singleness, then I am celebrating with you. I’m thankful God is allowing you to enjoy this unique time in your life.

But, I know there are many people who are struggling in their singleness {perhaps you are one of them}. Though I haven’t struggled with singleness specifically, I know people who have {or are}. Not only that, but I can completely relate to the waiting. If you’ve read here long, you know that my journey to become a mother to living children was not an easy one and I struggled with the waiting so much.

Please know that this post comes from someone who understands the waiting phase and has a heart for you. I may not understand your specific struggle, but I hurt for you and want you to know a few things.

There is nothing wrong with you.
Being single does not mean you aren’t good enough or that you don’t measure up. It might be easy to start the comparison game, wondering why that guy chose this or that girl rather than you. There’s really no human explanation for why or how people find their mates. You might be tempted to think you did something wrong or aren’t doing something right, but I would encourage you to caste those thoughts out just as soon as they pop into your head. Get off Facebook if you must.

Inner beauty is worth far more than outer beauty.
This could really be a post all to itself. This concept applies to everyone really, but I especially think singles need to hear this loudly and clearly. While men are certainly visual creatures, physical beauty is fleeting. My wrinkles are becoming more and more prominent and my body bears the marks of carrying children in my womb…and it will only get worse! Any man worth marrying would not make physical beauty his top priority, but would rather seek out one’s inner beauty. Make that what you focus on most and it will make your outer beauty glow even more radiantly.

Be the best YOU that you can be.
Rather than focusing on what someone else might have, work towards being the best YOU that you can be. Try to learn a new skill or hone the ones that you’ve already got. Consider pursuing some new interests in order to grow and develop as a person. If you want to be healthier or grow in some area of your life, make some goals and work towards them. God has gifted you in many ways to do things only you can do, so get out there and do them!

Celebrate the gifts you do have.
I find that when I’m discontented, thinking of the blessings I do have re-calibrates me quickly. It helps me to focus on what I have been given rather than what I am still waiting on. No matter what you are going through, there is always something for which to be thankful. It might sound cliche and trite, but it is so true.

It will be worth the wait.
I’ve never heard anyone who experienced the waiting say that it wasn’t worth it. Although I wouldn’t wish the waiting on anyone, I can almost guarantee it will make you appreciate the gift you’ve been given more than the average person. And that is important during the hard days of marriage. Also, God will likely use this time in your life to build a compassion in you that could never be achieved otherwise.

I hesitated to write this post because I don’t want this to come across the wrong way – any other way but in love. I know well-intended words can often sting, and I pray that my words in no way do that. Your hurt is real, but I also don’t want you to believe some of the lies that our culture {or the devil himself} might want you to believe.

If you, dear reader, are struggling with your singleness, know that I am praying for you on this Valentine’s Day. I am praying that God will remind you of His great love for you, because that, my friend, is the most romantic love story of all.