4 Reasons to Invest in Your Female Friends

I love being a mom.  It’s more than I ever imagined – it’s more work, but also far more love than I thought possible.  I wouldn’t trade these moments for all the extra sleep in the world.  I know these babies will be gone in a flash {as in grown and moved out} and I don’t want to miss a moment of it.

But, I’ve come to realize the important role that my girlfriends play in my life.  I don’t know about you, but if I’m not careful, my “identity” as wife and mom can take over my entire persona.  My husband and children have helped shape me into who I am today, but there’s more to me.  Does that make sense?

Just the other night, I was in a bit of a “funk.”  I’m not sure whether it was that I had been at home the past couple of days {cabin fever, anyone?}, that the kids kept fighting and whining, or whether it was just pregnancy hormones, but I was grumpy.

I thought to myself as I sat down to dinner, maybe I should see if ——– wants to grab some coffee tonight? 


Literally, a minute or so later I got a text from a friend asking if I wanted to get some coffee with her and another friend.

Yes, please!


Kevin is always so supportive of my “girl time” and I’m really thankful he was able and willing to watch the kids for me last night so that I could break away.

My spontaneous night out was just what I needed.  I was able to recharge a bit with some dear friends and focus on the blessings I do have rather than whatever “funk” I was in.  I woke up the next morning thankful for friends willing to reach out to me before I even have a chance to reach out to them.

Here’s the thing, friendships don’t happen easily {some are deeper than others} and they don’t happen overnight.  But, I’ve come to realize that they are worth the investment, even though my time is more limited now that I have a husband and children.  And here are 4 reasons why.

1.  We are built to be relational.
I tend to dislike swooping generalizations, but I think this one is probably true for most women.  Whether it comes easy for us or not, I think most women want to know and be known.  We want to “do life” with other people and know that we aren’t alone in our joys and struggles.

2.  We fill a “void” that no one else can.
I love my husband dearly and he has blessed me with companionship {and so much more} since we’ve been married.  But, there is something different about my relationship with my female friends and my husband.  When I’m with my girlfriends, I don’t always have to explain myself.  They just “get” what I’m saying and nod their heads because the know exactly what I mean.

3.  We learn so much from each other.
One thing I really value is friendship with women in different stages of life.  I love that I have some friends who are unmarried, some who are newly married, some who have been married for a while, some who have kids, and some who don’t have children yet {I’m sure I’m missing some other categories}.  Since some of us are at different stages of life, we have so much to learn from each other.  And even if we are in the same stage of life, we can still learn from sharing our own experiences with one another.

4.  We encourage one another.
Don’t we all need cheerleaders in our corner?  And can you ever have too many?  We all need encouragement to get through the highs and lows of life.  Sometimes we don’t need someone to try and solve our problems, but we just need someone in our corner rooting us along.  I’ve found that my female friends are often that extra someone cheering me on from the sideline.

Some practical ways to invest in your female friendships
– Pick up the phone and call
– Invite them over {or ask them to meet up somewhere}
– Send a quick text of encouragement
– Stop by their house if you are in the area

Sometimes I find that I over-complicate things when it comes to building friendships.  It can be as simple as inviting a friend along while I run some errands or grabbing a quick drink together from Starbucks.  Keep it simple!  It doesn’t usually matter what you are doing, but just making the connection that is important.